Objects in Space (poem)

We're just objects in space.

Drifting through the dark,
We dare to dream,
Devoid of direction,
But desperate for design.

We constantly come into contact
With other creatures of the
Cold, cavernous chasm,
Careful not to crash into most.

These show in different
Shapes and shifts, and,
Though surely don't share all themselves,
Yet shed some shorn-off shells.

Many make their mark
By streaming merrily along,
Meriting marvel, and moving us
To meditate on more than mere existence.

A relative few fly by,
And in their fashion,
Free some fragments of themselves,
Forcing us to feel them forever.

Periodically, however,
Perhaps predictably,
A passerby will pique our interest.
Perhaps we'll play a little while.

We swing about each other,
Sailing so close,
Serving sideways in a
Swirling storm.

But now we wonder:
Would it be wise
To lose our wits and WHAM!
We whisk away as one.

Musings on the Nature of Hope

That was probably the most disappointing moment of my life, right there. I stood up, and for some reason (I would attribute it to the single Twisted Pink Lemonade I had, but I'm not THAT much of a lightweight), the floor looked further away, and I swore I could see the tops of the moldings more easily. I was wondering how this could be, when the thought crossed my mind. Maybe...just maybe...I had grown.

I know, in retrospect, it was quite ridiculous, but at the time, my hopes overruled my sensibilities. I went to get my brother, even refusing to bend down and pet my cat on the way, lest I somehow lose my newly-gained height by lowering myself closer to the floor.

I gave him the ruler and stood against our old markings on the wall, holding my breath in anticipation. Alas, I still stood just as tall as I did on April 13th, 2005.

In my heart, I knew I hadn't really grown, but hope is a curious thing. It can make us believe in the impossible. It leads men to madness, but can also lead the downtrodden to victory.

It is truly amazing.

Red and Gold (poem)

I suppose, considering it's October 1st, I'll admit that it's finally Autumn.  So, in honor of this, I'm posting this poem I wrote in 2007 about Fall colors.  Enjoy. :)

Red and Gold

Fire burns the trees tonight,

fueled by the golden ball of the West.

The flames lick the branches

like children do candy,

eager to find the sweetest spot.

Like arms, they embrace,

reaching higher and higher,

as if to join their brothers in the sky,

changing in hue as they ascend.

Then, piece by piece,

the crinkled ashes drift to the ground,

once they have spent the juices

of the tree.

And what is left is barren,

but still graceful.

A twining, twisting work of ages,

left to rest from growth

until the Spring.

A Eulogy for Justice (poem)

I'd say this was a rough draft, but realistically-speaking, I'm not going to change anything here, so...here it is.

A Eulogy for Justice

Let us pray.

O, Justice, you beauteous creature, lost to us at the hands of those who swore to protect you!

Your fathers warned us, told us to take care, to keep our minds sharp and our senses keen,

But did we listen?  No.  For a time, we watched and listened and thought and remembered…

But soon, like sands upon the beach, our memories were washed away in waves of new events and fine distractions.

Justice, meantime, was locked away in a gilded rusty tower, a distant gleam on a dreary horizon.

Too soon, the tower was all we remembered, forgetting what great beauty lived inside.

And the protectors we’d assigned, in their long dark robes, realizing that the tower was so much easier than the beauty to tame and corrupt, did so, blood-stained quills scratching furiously to seal her fate, etching wall after wall of leather-bound chains, so that shortly, even the tower fell out of our minds.

And they, the black-robed traitors, with every pound of their hammers, raped and ravaged what was left of darling Justice until she was torn and trembling on the floor of her crumbling keep.

She may not yet be dead, but who can tell?

And so, this day, let us bow our heads, and think of Justice, the light of civilization.

May she rest in peace until she finds her way back home.

Day 5 Update Coming Soon, but...

...my mother was found guilty. I don't know how, really...I'm angry and confused, mostly. As you can imagine, I need some time to process this outcome before I can do a full report.

For now, I'll just say sure was interrupted three times by the Prosecution during her closing argument, and once, they even went to side bar (Google it). In their closing, the government did the same things they objected to my mom doing, but she didn't know the terms to object. They attacked her character, misrepresented facts, and appealed to the jury's pride, jealousy, and spite. It was...truly low.

More later, I promise.

P.S. A quick chuckle, perhaps: it turns out that Melissa Siskind, the primary Prosecutor, when she was looking at my Facebook, accidentally sent me a friend request. She deleted it, of course, but I still got the notification. So, that answers a couple questions, I suppose.

(Days 3 & 4 here...)

Trial of First Amendment Rights: Days 3 & 4

Day 3:
As it turns out, there was not much else to report besides what was mentioned here.

Day 4:
Today, it was the Defendant's turn to bring forth her witnesses and evidence. The questioning was straightforward, primarily going to the Defendant's state of mind regarding the court order that led her to this situation. The cross-examination by the Prosecution, however, was a little bit messy.

It seems the Prosecution has decided that ad hominem attacks are the best course of action in this case, as for each witness that they could manage it, they found pieces of writing done by the witnesses, and attempted to use those to damage the witnesses' credibility.

For example, they found this blog, and accused the author of encouraging jurors to lie during jury selection (see Day 1). The author, of course, said she would never encourage anyone to lie, and later clarified that, while such writing was perhaps rash, she has, like her family, been rather frustrated by this whole situation. Regardless, she meant no harm, and only hoped for truth and justice.

Perhaps even more interestingly, though, the Prosecution also mentioned the fact that the author desired assistance from the Fully Informed Jury Association (FIJA) in informing the jury regarding their right to make their verdict based on the lawfulness and/or constitutionality of a law or order, and could disregard a court's instruction if they so chose. So, seeing as FIJA was unfortunately unable to distribute literature describing such rights, it was in fact serendipitous that the Prosecution questioned the author regarding that post, as it gave her the opportunity to explain it to the jury herself in open court, on the record.

Next came the questioning of the Defendant by her assisting counsel, which was a bit bumpy due to some interrupting objections and evidentiary disagreements, but ultimately allowed the Defendant to explain herself in her own words to the jury regarding all aspects of the case. This appeared effective, and we shall see what the Prosecution asks tomorrow.

Finally, the jury left, and so began the hashing out of Jury Instructions. The Defendant and the Prosecution agreed on many points, but unfortunately, despite extremely reasonable and well-made arguments on the part of the Defendant regarding such crucial topics as the lawfulness of the given order and the willfulness element in a case of contempt, for example, the judge ruled in the Prosecution's favor in each case. Considering the comparitively weak arguments made by the Prosecution, the author can only conclude that there is bias involved, but hopes that the jury is able to overcome such evils, and bring justice to this case.

VERDICT

Day 3 Update Coming Soon...

Hello, friends!

I don't know whether any of you are in different time zones, but where I am, it's 2:28am, and I've just finished prepping copies of exhibits for tomorrow, and I still have to get at least some sleep, so I'll post updates for Days 3 and 4 tomorrow.  The super-short report of Day 3 is, though, that the government witnesses took the whole day, and of course were shady and dodgy the majority of that time. So, business as usual.

More on the morrow!

In the meantime, here's Day 2.

Trial of First Amendment Rights: Day 2

Day 1

A short report today, as much of the day consisted of an IRS agent droning on like a futuristic Amazon delivery, confirming that the Prosecution's exhibits were indeed what the  Prosecution claimed them to be. It is interesting to note, though, that during this thorough examination of records and testimony, the judge was actually seen tipping her head back, appearing to be asleep!

Still, it must be noted that she did not actually sleep through the whole trial. She in fact managed to join the  Prosecution in objecting to the Defendant's opening statement (a total of seven objections/interruptions). The reason given for the objections was that the statement was "too much like a closing argument." Finally, the judge simply told the Defendant she could not continue, even though she wasn't even halfway done.

However, we will end on a note of amusement. During the Prosecution's questioning of the aforementioned IRS agent, some of the pieces of evidence they claimed were IRS records were, in fact, copies of refund checks posted to the Defendant's husband's website (which the Defendant promptly pointed out). So, I suppose it's a good thing those exhibits were verified, after all.

Day 3

Trial of First Amendment Rights: Day 1

Background

Day 1

According to reports, the trial didn't really begin today because the opposing parties eliminated so many potential jurors during selection that they ran out, and will continue tomorrow.  However, the Defendant has only one remaining elimination, and the Prosecutor two, so proceedings will certainly get off the ground tomorrow.

However, prior to jury selection, the Prosecution introduced some pre-trial motions, as well as the prior testimony of a witness they intended to call to the stand.  The motions were in regards to the content of the Defendant's opening statement from October 2013's trial, asking the court to prohibit the Defendant from making certain claims in this round's statement.  The Defendant had been filing motions for months leading up to this trial, giving the Prosecution plenty of time to incorporate her requests, but the Prosecution chose to spring their requested changes on the Defendant potentially hours before opening statements were to be given.  The reader may conclude, as the author has, this was a dirty, cheap tactic employed to make the Defendant flustered and unprepared.

The other introduction was that of the new witness' testimony, which the Defendant have never before seen.  It was approximately 300 pages long.  Of course, had the trial commenced, she would have been able to request adjournment until she'd had time to read this extensive document, but the tactic employed here was, of course, the same as in the introduction of the impromptu motions.  One has to wonder, if the Prosecution is stooping to such tactics in an attempt to gain the upper hand, how secure can they really feel about their case?

And finally, a PSA: if you are a potential juror in a federal case, and you really don't like the government or one of its extensions, don't say you don't like them when you're being interviewed during selection, as some would-be jurors did today (and for which they were promptly eliminated by the Prosecution).  That's just silly.

Day 2

This post could literally change your life...

Friends, something is happening that could change everything about the American justice system.  I encourage you to please give the two pieces below a few moments of your time, as the outcome in this case could affect the rest of your life.

The first is an opening statement I wrote for my mom to use, wholly or in part, in her trial (the charge is contained in the statement).  The second is something I posted to the Fully Informed Jury Association's Detroit branch Facebook page.

As you'll see, this is of vital importance.  Please read it, and share this post with your friends, family, anyone you care about, and even everyone you don't care about.

We are Americans.  We live in the land of the free.  Let's keep it that way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My fellow Americans,

You are here to decide my fate, and the fate of my family, and also the fate of you and yours, as well.  Let me explain.

The government will try to tell you that this case is about taxes.  However, while it’s true that the forms in question are tax forms, the charges against me are not tax-related.  The charge is that of contempt of court, and I’m charged with that because I have resisted making testimony I believe to be false.  I was told to make such testimony, and not tell anyone I’d been forced to do so.

It might help if you consider the case of Meriam Ibrahim, the Sudanese woman being charged with apostasy and sentenced to death. Apostasy is the abandonment of a religion.  This woman could likely have that charge dropped against her if she simply said she was a Muslim.  She wouldn’t even have to believe it; she could just play the part.  But is that right?  Should someone have to claim to believe something they don’t in order to be safe?  No, and that right, the right to express our beliefs freely without fear of condemnation, applies to all human beings.

If the government were telling me I had to sign my name to a document claiming I believed that Zeus was the only true god, they wouldn’t even have a case.  But that hypothetical situation is not far from what’s happening here.  The government is not arguing the law; they’re arguing my beliefs.  They say I can’t possibly believe what I wrote on my tax forms, so I have to sign my name to forms with their beliefs on them, instead.  The thing is, there are very specific methods the IRS is supposed to use when it disagrees with someone’s return.  For example, they are required by law to simply file forms with the numbers they believe are correct.  They don’t even need my signature on them.  But they haven’t done that, which leads me to believe that they don't actually disagree with the information on my returns, they simply dislike it.  Therefore, they’re trying to force me to testify something I don’t believe to be true, so they don't have to.

As I’m sure you can imagine, this is incredibly frustrating to me, to say the least.  How can I swear to something I don’t believe, and not tell anyone I don’t believe it?  If I did that by choice, it would be perjury, a crime in and of itself.  I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place.  If I sign, I’ll be committing a crime, but if I don’t…well, here we are.

As I said, the government will try to tell you this is about taxes.  It’s not.  It’s not even about money, to be honest.  Even with the numbers they want me to sign to, I wouldn’t owe any taxes.

So what is it about?  It’s about basic human rights.  If I’m condemned, what else can the government make someone swear to?  Will America become the Sudan?  This is what I meant when I said you’d be deciding your own fate, too.

Please, remember our rights, and protect them.

Thank you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FIJA of Detroit!  I'm not sure whether you've heard, but my mother will be on trial (again -- last time, in October, there was a hung jury) next week.  She's being held in contempt of court for not following a judge's order.  In her case, the jury is being instructed as follows:

1) The lawfulness of the order given by the judge need not be considered.
[This is a flagrant disregard for the rule of law, as part of the requirements for this charge is that the order be lawful.]

2) The jury does not need to be unanimous in its determination regarding both charges.
[She's charged with refusing to sign her name to testimony she doesn't believe, and also refusing to file testimony of the same type in the future.  This rule says that, if some jurors think she's guilty of one charge, and the rest think she's guilty of the other, they can submit a Guilty verdict, anyway.]

The jury is being instructed to act against the law.  If we could have a couple of representatives outside the courthouse for this trial (dates can be found at the end of this page: http://www.losthorizons.com/Documents/AssaultOnTheTruth-SpeechRights-AndTheJury.pdf), that would be phenomenal.

Stand up against this assault on justice!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Again, please share this post!  Preserve our rights...before it's too late.

Read about Day 1

The Dangers of Apathy

Preface: Not my best writing, but bear with me.



Well.......this is awkward, to say the least.

And yet, despite the obvious cruelty occurring in these farms, here in Michigan, the "Right to Farm" was just taken from us last month by the Commission of Agriculture and Rural Development, probably at the behest of big corporations wanting to keep control of the market.

Isn't that awful?  We could be taking a stand against those corporations and their practices by raising our own dairy, meat, etc., but the government's stepped in and said that's not ok.

But see, it's even bigger than just this issue.  These kinds of regulatory acts happen all the time, and most people are completely unaware, similarly to what's talked about at the end of the video.  Except this type of willful ignorance is almost worse, because it's not even that you all know, but don't want to; you're not even trying to know.  The kind of apathy with regards to politics is SO damaging, but I see it everywhere.  You say, "politics doesn't affect me."  But it does, don't you see?

Part of why this issue is such a good example is that you're going to sit there after watching that video, and feel bad about it, and want to do something about it.  Now, you could boycott the big companies and only buy free range/organic/whatever, that's a valid option.  But money's tight, sometimes, and those tend to be more expensive.  So maybe you could raise your own food, as mentioned above, but oh wait, you can't.  Government says no.

But there's the crux of the issue: if you'd been paying attention to what your government was doing in the first place, maybe you could've stopped this before it even took hold.

Now, you're going to have to kill the weed after it's grown, rather than having kept the seed from even being planted.

Now, not only will it be harder for you to help yourself, it'll be harder for you to help the animals, too.

Pay attention, people.  As Pericles said, "Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you."

Put some clothes on, woman!

So, I posted this as a comment in reply to this article yesterday, and I was pretty proud of it, so I thought I'd put it here, too:

I'm just gonna throw this out there: personally, I think that no matter what size you are, if I would be able to have sex with you if you simply leaned forward, what you're wearing is too short. I realize that this is my opinion, and I'm not saying that people shouldn't be able to wear what they like, or should be held responsible for someone else's actions, thoughts, whatever. However, have some self-respect. You can be perfectly confident in what you wear and how you look without pushing the envelope of modesty.

Confidence: belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities
Respect: esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability

When you wear short skirts/dresses like that, whether you like it or not, you are drawing eyes to that region, and many people will think how easy it would be to do something about it. Yes, it's twisted, but we're creatures of instinct at our roots. So, with that in mind, why would you want that to be someone's first (even involuntary) thought when they see you?

Yes, you can wear it; yes, you look great. But we're always saying "Eyes up here." Let's not just talk like that's what we want; let's dress that way, too.

Uncle Reyn, Pt. 2

Part 1

It's been almost five months since I found out my uncle was dead.

I still have the funeral pamphlet on my mirror, and I cry about his death at least once a week.

I've tried to take the pamphlet down, but that somehow feels disrespectful.  I feel like I should be healed by now, but then I remember that grieving is a personal process.  It may never be over.

I think the worst part is that nagging feeling that I should've done something.  I mean, technically, we're still not sure (or maybe we just don't want to be sure) that it was actually suicide, but let's just assume it was.  Because, frankly, the signs were all there, and this is what I want to talk about.

"Hindsight is 20/20."  This means that, when looking back at something, it all suddenly seems so clear.  And we think to ourselves, If I had only picked up on that one thing, I could've fixed everything.  Perhaps, but what good does that do, to beat ourselves up for not seeing something at the time?  It does no good, none.

But that's what I've been doing.  I've been chewing myself out, imaging scenario after scenario of me stepping in at that crucial moment, making sure my uncle got the help he needed, or convincing him not to do it, or telling the family so they could help, too...and saving his life.  Except that I didn't.  I don't know whether I really didn't see, or I didn't want to see, but looking back, the signs were there.  I remember being worried about him, that he was downing those glasses of wine pretty quickly, losing weight too much too fast, going grayer than seemed right, wringing his hands almost constantly, saying things like, "I have no purpose."

That sentence still echoes in my head whenever I think about Christmas 2013, when he said it, the last time we saw him alive.  I can see every single sign so clearly, and could then, but something in me thought he'd never go that far, never really follow through.

My point is this: DO NOT ignore those signs.  If you see someone acting strangely, depressed, distraught, etc., do not assume that they won't do anything.  I've been there, too, and I can tell you the feelings of hopelessness, uselessness, and loneliness can get so overwhelming sometimes...it's difficult to keep my head above water.  Even when I think of the ones I love, and the ones who love me, death just sounds like such a peaceful thing.  I'm fortunate enough to have people to talk to and to know that I should talk to them, but not everyone will reach out.

However, they will often give hints.  I think that's a subconscious thing, their mind trying to save them indirectly, but whatever it is, you have to pay attention.  Don't assume that just because "they don't seem that depressed," they aren't dying inside.  It's better to make the effort, and be wrong, then to not reach out, and be too late.

Be aware.  Take action.  Save a life.

I need a link to this picture for a Tumblr post, so feel free to disregard...actually, don't.  Cuz let's be honest, I am fabulous. ;)

P.S. Tumblr is http://www.tumblr.com/blog/shadowkat91

Uncle Reyn

     I attended my uncle’s funeral service today…his death was not natural.  While suicide would seem the most obvious answer, there are things surrounding his death that are very strange.  Regardless, though, he was stolen from us.  Now, I realize that anyone who does not die of old age could be said to have been “stolen,” but this was somehow…moreso.  Some human took my uncle’s life.  It should not have been so.

     The service was beautiful, full of memories and anecdotes, tears and laughter.  I never realized how truly brilliant he was until today, when I heard more stories about him than I ever had before.  Many people from various parts of his life were kind enough to share some of theirs, and then it was the family’s turn.  While I was not his child, I chose to say a word, as well:

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     My Uncle Reyn and I had one of the best uncle/niece relationships you could ask for.  Like the best uncle, he was mischievous and fun, with a twinkle in his eye and a song in his heart.  And his heart was huge; the one word that comes to mind when I think of him is “generous”.  Almost every time I went to his house, especially when I was younger, I would meet someone new.  He was always sharing everything with everyone; he held nothing back.

     In fact, he took me on a couple of trips with him, just because he felt like taking me.  When I was thirteen, it was two weeks in Chile, and when I was nine, a week and a half in The Netherlands.  I have been eternally grateful for the culture I was able to experience in Chile, and the wonderful views and people there.  Unfortunately, I don’t remember much from the Netherlands trip, but I do remember one thing very strongly.

     One day, we went sailing on a lake to have a picnic on an island.  Mind you, this is the Netherlands; it’s cold.  But a few of our party were swimming, anyway, and they all kept trying to convince me to go in the water with them.  I resisted repeatedly, until Uncle Reyn taunted me, saying I was “too scared” to get in the water.  At that point, not wanting to be a wimp, I jumped in…and immediately regretted it.

     Now, I don’t know whether he intended to teach me a lesson (probably not), but after that, I vowed to never be swayed by taunting again.  Of course, I was a teenager for a while, so I did give in to peer pressure on occasion, but anytime someone said I was “too scared” to do something, I didn’t care.  They weren’t convincing me that way.

     A sense of loss is produced when we know what something could have been, and then it never comes to be.  We are mourning today for the loss of potential – potential years, potential memories, potential time.  But, as my brother TJ so wisely pointed out, we have to focus on the fact that we had the privilege of passing years, making memories, and spending time with this wonderful, amazing, loving man.  Of course, we wish he’d been able to stay with us longer in this world, but as long as we keep him and what he gave us alive in our minds, hearts, and souls, he’ll be with us as long as we live.

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     The sad thing is, part of me still entertains the idea that he could have stolen a cadaver, set it up like a suicide, left all his things, and headed to Utah to herd the cows with Miv as my grandma suggested to him eight times on Christmas Day, when we last saw him.  I know it’s unlikely, especially for him to leave the dog, cats, and alpacas behind without taking care of them first, but…it’s such a wonderful thought -- that I could someday find him, lean and bright-eyed, beard all grown out, wearing jeans and a flannel shirt, with that radiant smile back on his face.  He’d scoop me into a hug, look me in the eye, and in mock seriousness, boop me on the nose.  Then I’d boop him back, we’d have a good laugh, and talk about life.  He’d ask me how I’ve been, I’d tell him, “Pretty good.”  Then he’d tell me about all the adventures he’d had on the motorcycle he’d bought when he moved out west, and invite me to come along on another one with him, just like old times.  Of course, I’d accept, and off we’d ride to tackle the world.

     I love you, Uncle Reyn.  I hope you’re having fun, wherever you are. <3

Part 2